[dmfmfd136]

I am in need of some advice about sleeping qtrs. I will try to make a long story short....When I was hired as a paramedic the fire and ems departments were seperate. About 3 years ago they merged, with MANY problems...one being the fire supr. guys wanted those wanting to cross over into the '77 pension to do their 26 step hire process. Which basically was that they really wanted us to take their agility testing, knowing that some would fail. When we hired on we took an agility test and didn't see the need to do so again. There was a 2 year battle to allow 5 of us into the '77 pension. There is animosity from some because they didn't/don't want paramedics and a female (in case you haven't figured out yet, that would be me, and yes I am the only female on the dept) to cross over because we didn't take "their test". So, we fight the battle and 4 of us are able to get into the pension and all of the EMS dept is now crosstrained as ffs. As we take our turns with the ff/medics-or a-emts to allow them time on the ambo we work on the ALS engines. At my regular station I have my own qtrs. We have 2 other stations without female qtrs and 2 with ...however the A/C, B/C and Cpts sleep in there. My question....where do I sleep??? Some of the white shirts say in the general population others say when I'm at the stations with female qtrs the others can sleep out with the rest. I am torn. I do like having my own qtrs, but I have no problem sleeping in with the general population. I don't feel like it's right to "kick out" the brass for my own qtrs, but I don't really want to cause conflict with the guys in the general population. I feel like either way I go there is going to be an issue. I want to do what is best for the dept and for future women. HELP~ any and all advise would be greatly appreciated!!

[Kelly]

We have 4 women on our department and as far as I know we all sleep with general population. 1 out of 5 of the firehouses has an open bunk room with 2 areas walled ( 2 beds in each area) but it is darkest in the main part. The other 4 houses have 5 foot tall walls between the bunks and a "quiet room" anyone can use the room, but usually it is reserved for the snorers. When I first started on shift the guys wanted me to sleep in the same area as them because they felt like I wasn't part of the family. We do wear our class D shorts and tshirts to bed, so there is no problem with skin showing.

[firething]

I would push to be treated like everyone else regarding sleeping quarters. Why give the complainers something else to whine about, and why give them an opportunity to further marginalize you by making you sleep in a separate room away from your crew? The guys who push me hardest to sleep in my department's second-rate women's quarters are usually the ones who are the most uncomfortable having women on the job. Reminds me of Jim Crow.

[Karen Leming]

In my opinion you should sleep with the general population.For one, you would be more favorably looked upon for the compromise that you made, and in addition you would be creating stronger ties with the people you will work more often with.

[fuegodiva]

We have 2 women in the suppression division in my department (out of 200 men), and have had little problem with the arrangements. We are down to just one station that has a common bunkroom, and that is the one that I am permanently assigned to. Nobody has a problem with the women sleeping in the bunk, as we too just wear shorts and a T shirt to sleep. The only disadvantage to the common bunkroom is the *snorers*!

There will always be those who complain just for the sake there of. If your crew has no issue with it, and you are comfortable with it, then there should be no problem. We are all adults, and should be able to act responsibly about the arrangements. Good luck!
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What one thing would you do if you that you could not fail?

[smitty088]

Dear Firefighters

Can you sleep in long sleeping pants or spandex pants and still don your gear quickly? Or is it too uncomfortable with gear?

Is it unreasonable to wear ear plugs to not hear snorers or do you think you would miss the alarm? Is a walkman on low to disturbing for others sleeping?

When it is time to sleep and you want to do some reading with a nightlight is that not allowed?

Thanks to you all for your insightfulness and being a great resource for me.

Much gratitude,
Tia
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TT

[Kelly]

If your department issues sweats wear them to bed. I know at most of our houses we like to keep the bunkroom at about 67 degrees so for people who don't like cold it can get chilly. I would not wear spandex. Its easy to get your gear on over long pants. As for earplugs or a walkman I wouldn't, our bells are loud but you don't want to risk it. If we choose to read we just stay in the dayroom, when its time to sleep we go to bed with the lights off. If you need white noise to sleep try a fan most are okay with it. If you're unsure about how things work at the firehouse you can always ask when you get to your assigned one.

[smitty088]

Thank one Kelly. The information you provided is very insightful. Thank you.

Tia
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TT

[dmfmfd136]

Thanks for your replies! I was pretty much of the same thinking as most of you! I feel that I've been here long enough and the guys see I am a "girl's guy" "one of the guys" etc and that I can/do do the job. We all have met the pain in the a** chicks that are in our field, and fortunately for them, I am not one. I just want to make this as smooth and comfortable as possible. Do I need to worry about what the "guys will say/think" or heaven for bid "what will the wives say" ?? I'm thinking not. If they are that insecure with themselves and their marriages...well, thats their problem...besides I would like to say to them "puuulease! don't flatter yourself to think I would want him!" LOL
Ok...now the next issue...restrooms, showers and locker rooms...2 stations do not have seperate areas and the other 2 are the same the officers are in. How do I handle this? During the day is a no brainer, as far as using other restrooms in the station, but at night? changing? showering?

[fuegodiva]

Some of our firehouses have two bathrooms...one big one with 4/5 showers and sinks, and a smaller one that may have 1/2 showers/toilets/sinks. When I work in one of those houses, I use the smaller bathroom (seems logical as the other 9 guys otherwise, would have to cram into the little bathroom...as humorous as the mental image is...). At those houses it is just a common courtesy that the women use the small bathroom and the rest use the big one.

We do have houses that just have big bathrooms, so what the house capatain did was install a $2 slide lock on the door. Problem solved. Again, we are all grown-ups and this isn't a big deal.

As far as the issue of jealousy with the wives goes, I have not had an issue myself, but I have heard of some wives who have *made mention* about women working with *their* men. I have found that over time, as you meet them, and even become friends, the issue resolves itself. Unfortunately there are *those women* firefighters who *may* perceive this job as a convenient dating circle...that's where the problems arise. But again, I think that is the exception rather than the rule.
_________________
What one thing would you do if you that you could not fail?

[smitty088]

When I think in terms of the seriousness of firefighting and the workplace as being one based on a book of rules for the fire crew. I understand the responsibility and privilege bestowed upon firefighters to serve the community.

Therefore it is imperative that the fire house is operated to the 'nines' in all aspects to ensure the dignity and respect it deserves from the community.

Likewise I believe the community will have the upmost confidence that they will receive professional, confidential and honest emergency health care. And that their bodies' and their families' bodies will be treated with dignity and respect. And to me this is what firefighting is all about. As well as protection of an individual's personal property. (home, boats, cars, personal belongings, and etc.)

Thank you for sharing and allowing me to participate and offer my insight.

Much gratitude.

Tia
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TT

[BLACKWIDOW]

I HAVE BEEN A FULL TIME PAID FIREFIGHTER FOR OVER 22 YEARS. WE USED TO SLEEP IN ONE BIG DORM. THE MEN CHANGED THAT. SOME WERE AFRAID OF THEIR WIVES SOME DID NOT WANT TO BE ACCUSED...I LIKE SEPERATE SLEEPING QUARTERS, WE HAD GUYS WHO SLEPT NAKED NO MATTER WHO WAS IN THE DORM. ONE STATION HAD BEDS 3 FEET APART AND THE F/F NEXT TO ME WOKE WITH AN ERRECTION EVERY TIME WE HAD A CALL. AND ONE GUY TOOK OFF HUS UNDEROOS AND PUT ON A CLEAN PAIR 2 FEET FROM ME !! NOT TURNING HIS BACK. SO I LIKE THE SEPERATION AND DID NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE BEGININGS
AS TO THE RESTROOMS... WE ALSO HAD ONE BIG ONE.. I HAVE HAD A GUY GET IN THE NEXT STALL WHEN I WAS IN THE SHOWER, I HAD ONE GUY COME IN AND BRUSH HIS TEETH AS I SHOWERED STANDING AT THE SINK 3 FEET FROM AND ACROSS FROM THE SHOWER DOOR WHICH WAS "FROSTED"
NOW WHEN I COME IN I HAVE TO CLEAN THE SEAT IN THE FEMALE RESTROOM JUST TO USE IT AND MOVE THE PORN. MY CHILDREN USE THE SAME BATHROOM. LITTLE GIRLS SOMETIMES HAVE THEIR PANTIES TOUCH THE COMODE TRANSFERING THE URINE LEFT THERE FROM THE MEN TO THEIR PANTIES. SO NOW EXPLAIN WHY SOME GUYS DNA IS IN SOME CHILDS PANTIES.
I KNOW THIS IS AN OLD POST SO SOME MAY NEVER SEE IT.
JUST WHAT I HAVE EXPERIENCED

[smitty088]

WHOA!! DISGUSTING!!
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TT

[dmfmfd136]

I am still torn on the issue. Men are such immature pigs. One would think that at some point they would be over sharing their burping & farting. Some of the things you mentioned I have encountered at my current station, however, I don't believe they would be issues at the other stations. Altho, I could be proven wrong, because I didn't expect the things that have happened to me to occur either! I do like having my own space to get away from them and their BS. On the other hand I don't want them to think I'm getting special treatment. Damned if you do and damned if you don't! Thanks for sharing!

[ltmalinski]

"Men are such immature pigs. One would think that at some point they would be over sharing their burping & farting.", "I do like having my own space to get away from them and their BS."

I hate more than anything being treated like a 'lady' at the fire station. I certainly believe that firefighters should live, eat, and sleep together. Our lives depend on each other, and every effort to know each other and trust each other should be taken advantage of. Getting away from their BS is known as the end of the shift. Every job has BS, that's why we get to go home at the end of work time.

I have worked a long time to be accepted as a firefighter without reference to being a "female firefighter". I really am tired of women complaining about men's immature behavior. Women named Sandra Forcier, Judith Livers, Sharon Flory, Paula Haavistola, Victoria Pietras and countless others, including myslef, fought to become firefighters accepted by the men we work with, we were not forced into this position and ruthlessly subjected to openly appreciated belching. Get over it.

If you decide to work with a bunch of men, you don't get to whine because they act like men. If they discriminate against you or harass you, by all means, follow up on it. The porn in the bathroom sounds like a bad choice, get rid of it, let them know you don't want your kids seeing it, be an adult about it, they just might respond in kind. Most men do not want to offend anyone, they just want to be themselves, and they are willing to fight you tooth and nail if they think you are threatenting their way of life. Assimilate to what you can and ask them to compromise with you on the rest.

Take it for what it is, advice and experience. I don't aim to irritate, just educate. I have been in male dominated careers long enough to understand them.
Good luck,
Jenn